Happy Thanksgiving!
This year we decided to stay home and do like, NOTHING. It's been AWESOME! So relaxing. I am thankful for my crazy family. A lot of the time, that's a CHOICE I have to make. When everyone is crying and whining, and not listening, I get to choose Thankfulness.
There have been so many times in this last year as a twin Mom and Mom that Thankfulness has eluded me. As I fight to climb up to a thankful heart, I fight lies that I often believe. Lies like, "God stuck me with twins", "I am a horrible Mom and Wife", "I'm all alone".
This past Sunday, the Sermon was on Psalm 23. When I heard the passage to be covered, I did not expect the depth, tears, or heart work that God would do that day. The Pastor opened by sharing how David opens with claiming, "The Lord is my Shepherd". The tune of the rest of this Psalm is based on this one phrase. That God is MY Shepherd. Without that, the rest of the Psalm falls flat. He then began to share how God leads in all things. We so often want to believe that this means that God wants all easy things for us. But, verse 4 definitely negates that thought pattern, "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff comfort me." The Pastor shared how some hard things will never be removed this side of eternity. But, God intends them for our good. And, HE walks with us every step of the way. God is GOOD. Even in the hard of life. This is when the tears flowed. Because I realized that I didn't believe that. I SAID I did. But, my actions don't show it. And, deep down, if I am really honest, I just struggle to believe that God is good when things are hard. And, instead of "The LORD is my shepherd" at the beginning, so often my heart says, "Comfort is my shepherd" or "Sleep is my shepherd", or "A perfect house is my Shepherd". Anyone else? Am I alone here? I kind of doubt it dear reader. Because, human nature chooses anything but God. And, God is the one who draws us to him in spite of all of this. The Psalmist ends, "Surly goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever." God will hold us in the palm of His hand. All this hard, all these struggles, all the pain this side of heaven cannot remove us from the Shepherd fold. Oh what comfort. I am slowly beginning to speak truth and hide God's promises in my heart for when the days I don't believe that He is good hover over me like a dark cloud. Because, those feelings my friend are oh so real. But you and I both know, that God's truth contradicts that. And, we get to speak life and Scripture over the lies.
So, today I choose thankfulness. And, God is continuing to work in my heart and life. I pray He works in yours too.
A few things I am thankful for:
1. Time with my boys. They are only little so long. And, as a friend shared, "I know I am going to miss this someday."
2. My husband. He chooses to love me through good times and bad. And, he often makes hard choices and sacrifices so that I don't drown in this thing called Motherhood.
3. My home. It's not perfect, but it's ours. And, it is a gift from the Lord.
4. God's goodness to hold me and keep me, teach me, uplift me, and show me His goodness and how to choose and know that He is good even when I stumble and fall flat on my face in the process.
5. Easter eggs. Because, thanksgiving is a great time to color eggs if your kids think that would be fun. Right? LOL
There have been so many times in this last year as a twin Mom and Mom that Thankfulness has eluded me. As I fight to climb up to a thankful heart, I fight lies that I often believe. Lies like, "God stuck me with twins", "I am a horrible Mom and Wife", "I'm all alone".
This past Sunday, the Sermon was on Psalm 23. When I heard the passage to be covered, I did not expect the depth, tears, or heart work that God would do that day. The Pastor opened by sharing how David opens with claiming, "The Lord is my Shepherd". The tune of the rest of this Psalm is based on this one phrase. That God is MY Shepherd. Without that, the rest of the Psalm falls flat. He then began to share how God leads in all things. We so often want to believe that this means that God wants all easy things for us. But, verse 4 definitely negates that thought pattern, "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff comfort me." The Pastor shared how some hard things will never be removed this side of eternity. But, God intends them for our good. And, HE walks with us every step of the way. God is GOOD. Even in the hard of life. This is when the tears flowed. Because I realized that I didn't believe that. I SAID I did. But, my actions don't show it. And, deep down, if I am really honest, I just struggle to believe that God is good when things are hard. And, instead of "The LORD is my shepherd" at the beginning, so often my heart says, "Comfort is my shepherd" or "Sleep is my shepherd", or "A perfect house is my Shepherd". Anyone else? Am I alone here? I kind of doubt it dear reader. Because, human nature chooses anything but God. And, God is the one who draws us to him in spite of all of this. The Psalmist ends, "Surly goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever." God will hold us in the palm of His hand. All this hard, all these struggles, all the pain this side of heaven cannot remove us from the Shepherd fold. Oh what comfort. I am slowly beginning to speak truth and hide God's promises in my heart for when the days I don't believe that He is good hover over me like a dark cloud. Because, those feelings my friend are oh so real. But you and I both know, that God's truth contradicts that. And, we get to speak life and Scripture over the lies.
So, today I choose thankfulness. And, God is continuing to work in my heart and life. I pray He works in yours too.
A few things I am thankful for:
1. Time with my boys. They are only little so long. And, as a friend shared, "I know I am going to miss this someday."
2. My husband. He chooses to love me through good times and bad. And, he often makes hard choices and sacrifices so that I don't drown in this thing called Motherhood.
3. My home. It's not perfect, but it's ours. And, it is a gift from the Lord.
4. God's goodness to hold me and keep me, teach me, uplift me, and show me His goodness and how to choose and know that He is good even when I stumble and fall flat on my face in the process.
5. Easter eggs. Because, thanksgiving is a great time to color eggs if your kids think that would be fun. Right? LOL
Our colored hands.
Comments
Post a Comment
I would love to hear what you have to say. Please share your thoughts.